How to Set Up ABA Pretend Play Activities That Build Social Skills: A Step-by-Step Guide
Introduction
ABA pretend play can increase language acquisition by up to 50% in children with developmental delays. Many parents notice their autistic child prefers lining up toys or sorting blocks rather than playing “house” or “store.”
Your child’s play style isn’t wrong. We’re adding new tools to their toolbox, not replacing the ones they already love.
Pretend play supports the development of cognitive, social and language skills, research shows. It strengthens autism social imagination and communication through joint attention and symbolic play.
This piece will show you step-by-step how to set up pretend play examples at home, move from parallel play to cooperative play, and use ABA modeling techniques that make learning feel natural and fun.
Understanding the Building Blocks: Joint Attention and Symbolic Play
Two foundational skills make pretend play possible: joint attention and symbolic play. We need to understand these before setting up Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) pretend play scenarios.
What is Joint Attention and Why It Matters
Joint Attention happens when two people coordinate their focus on the same object or event for social reasons. Typically developing children begin this triadic engagement around 12 months of age and move their gaze between an object and another person.
This skill has two parts. Responding to Joint Attention (RJA) develops first. Your child follows your gaze or point to look at something you’re showing them. You point to a bird in the sky and your child looks up to see it. Initiating Joint Attention (IJA) comes next. Your child directs your attention to something interesting by pointing, holding up an object, or alternating their gaze between you and the item.
Joint attention skills often develop differently for autistic children. Research shows that better joint attention skills early on predict stronger communication abilities later. Joint attention plays a central role in language development because your child hears you label objects during these shared moments and is primed to learn new words.
Teaching Symbolic Play to Children with Autism
Symbolic Play occurs when your child uses objects or actions to represent other things. A child using a doll as their baby and rocking it to sleep demonstrates symbolic play.
Many autistic children use toys non-functionally or repetitively. This represents a core difference, not a deficit. The good news? We can teach symbolic play. Studies using Pivotal Response Training showed that all children learned to perform complex and creative symbolic play actions at levels like language-matched typical controls after specific training.
Symbolic play relates strongly to language development. The better your child’s knowing how to play representationally, the stronger their language skills become. Symbolic play also provides early opportunities for taking another’s view and allows children to think about what a pirate might want or what a doctor might do.
How These Skills Connect to Pretend Play
Joint attention and pretend play skills develop together. Children with autism show most important improvements in language capabilities when they learn both skills during preschool years through our Natural Environment Teaching approach. Children need these building blocks in place before participating in cooperative pretend play scenarios like playing “grocery store” so they can share focus with play partners and understand that a block can become a phone.
Moving from Parallel Play to Cooperative Play
Starting with Parallel Play
Parallel play happens when children play side-by-side without direct interaction. Between 18 months and two years old, you’ll notice your child sitting near peers, perhaps building with blocks while another child stacks cups nearby. They aren’t sharing toys or talking, but they’re observing and mimicking actions on occasion.
This stage supports language development and motor skills while building confidence. Autistic children may experience parallel play longer than neurotypical peers. That’s acceptable. Children with autism often use this time to process social information and develop awareness of peers’ actions.
Set up opportunities by scheduling playdates with one or two children of similar age. Offer sensory play activities like playdough or building blocks that draw children to the same space naturally. You can provide a framework by introducing shared materials, such as a bucket of blocks, to encourage proximity without overwhelming your child.
Bridging the Gap: Becoming Part of the Game
Your child will feel comfortable playing near others. Then introduce simple cooperative elements. To cite an instance, if children are playing with cars side-by-side, suggest building a road that connects their play areas. This encourages collaboration without pressure.
Be patient during this process. Each child progresses at their own pace. Acknowledge small steps, such as when your child hands a crayon to another child. That gesture represents growth of the most important kind.
Recognizing When Your Child Is Ready for Cooperative Play
Watch for these readiness signs:
- Mimicking a peer’s actions
- Sharing toys spontaneously
- Making eye contact during play
- Showing curiosity about what others are doing
Most children begin cooperative play between ages four and five. Children work together toward shared goals and establish rules while solving problems jointly. Our parent guide resources can help you support this transition through structured play activities.
Setting Up Structured Pretend Play Scenarios
Setting Up Structured Pretend Play Scenarios
Three scenarios work well for teaching ABA pretend play because children already have real-life experiences with them.
The Vet Clinic Setup
Create a veterinary clinic using stuffed animals as patients. Gather medical tools including a stethoscope, thermometer, bandages, cotton balls, and plastic syringes. Add patient intake forms and clipboards for record-keeping[122]. Organize supplies in labeled containers to build print awareness and extend play duration. A white lab coat helps your child step into the veterinarian role.
The Grocery Store Setup
Stock shelves with empty food containers from your recycling bin or play food sets. Set up a checkout area with a cash register and play money[132]. Provide shopping lists and store advertisements to encourage literacy skills during play. Create different sections like produce and canned goods using baskets and labels. The familiarity of grocery shopping makes role-playing come naturally.
The Restaurant Setup
Transform your play area with menus featuring pictures for non-readers. Include order forms or notepads for servers[142]. Role name tags identifying positions like chef and waiter reduce conflicts about who plays which part. Add table settings and aprons to make the restaurant feel authentic.
Choosing the Right Props and Materials
Select toys that help with pretend play and role-playing. Props should be durable and simple to operate, and they should allow children to explore real-life experiences. Costumes, play kitchens, and miniature household items enable children to mimic adult behaviors in safe environments. Note that pretend play develops skills needed for social relationships and communication.
Using ABA Modeling Techniques During Play
What is Modeling in ABA Therapy
Modeling involves demonstrating a target behavior for your child to observe and imitate. You can model in-vivo (live demonstration), through video, or via audio. Research shows modeling teaches social skills, play skills, self-help abilities, and communication. Video modeling may produce faster skill acquisition than live modeling.
Narrating Your Actions Instead of Giving Commands
You might have asked “What color is this?” or “What is that?” before. Narrate what you see instead: “That’s a doll. The doll’s going to sleep”. Narrate the child’s play and model language with exaggerated affect to build participation. Grab another car and mirror their sounds and movements if your child walks around with a car. This conveys “I see you, I hear you.”
Making Play Irresistible Through Exaggeration
Playfulness motivates attention to objects and activities. Match their enthusiasm with high playfulness to capture their attention at the time your child moves from activity to activity. High-pitched greetings and peek-a-boos help initiate productive sessions. Ramp up or scale down playfulness based on your child’s moment-to-moment responsiveness.
Fading Your Support Over Time
Begin with full demonstrations and reduce your involvement over time. Your child builds independence through this systematic fading process and performs skills without prompts or supports.
Conclusion
Your child’s unique play style is perfect as it is. What we’ve shown you today simply adds new possibilities to their world. Start with one scenario that matches your child’s interests, whether it’s the vet clinic or grocery store setup. Use ABA modeling techniques and narrate their actions playfully. Watch as joint attention and symbolic play unfold. Celebrate each small step toward cooperative play, and note that progress happens at your child’s pace, not ours.
Key Takeaways
These evidence-based strategies help parents create meaningful pretend play experiences that naturally develop social skills and communication abilities in children with autism.
• Build foundational skills first: Establish joint attention and symbolic play before introducing cooperative pretend play scenarios
• Start with parallel play: Allow children to play side-by-side without pressure, gradually introducing shared materials and collaborative elements
• Use familiar scenarios: Set up vet clinics, grocery stores, or restaurants with realistic props that connect to your child’s real-world experiences
• Narrate instead of commanding: Model actions while describing what you see rather than asking questions or giving direct instructions
• Match your child’s energy: Use exaggerated enthusiasm and playfulness to capture attention, then gradually fade support as independence grows
Remember that every child progresses at their own pace. These ABA techniques transform everyday play into powerful learning opportunities that strengthen communication, social imagination, and cooperative skills naturally.
FAQs
Q1. How does pretend play help develop social skills in children? Pretend play creates natural opportunities for children to build social skills as they collaborate with siblings and peers. During these activities, children practice picking roles, creating shared storylines, and resolving conflicts that arise—all essential components of social development and cooperative interaction.
Q2. What social skills can children practice through role-playing activities? Role-playing scenarios like playing house, doctor, veterinarian, teacher, or cashier allow children to explore different social situations in a safe environment. These pretend scenarios help children practice communication, turn-taking, perspective-taking, and understanding various social roles they encounter in real life.
Q3. What types of play activities effectively teach social skills to preschoolers? Effective social skills activities for preschoolers include puppet shows for identifying emotions and practicing empathy, turn-taking games like board games or “Red Light, Green Light,” group art projects that encourage cooperation and teamwork, and emotion charades to build awareness of facial expressions and feelings.
Q4. Why is joint attention important for pretend play development? Joint attention—when two people coordinate their focus on the same object or event—is foundational for pretend play because it enables children to share experiences with play partners. Better joint attention skills early on predict stronger communication abilities later and help children learn new words when objects are labeled during these shared moments.
Q5. How can parents transition their child from parallel play to cooperative play? Parents can bridge this gap by introducing simple cooperative elements once their child is comfortable playing near others. For example, if children are playing with cars side-by-side, suggest building a connecting road. Watch for readiness signs like mimicking peers’ actions, sharing toys spontaneously, making eye contact during play, and showing curiosity about what others are doing.