How to Build Shared Attention Through Books, Games, and Play
You open a favorite picture book and point to an animal on the page. Your child presses a sound button, leans closer, brings you another book, or pauses to see what you will do next. These may all be ways of sharing attention.
Shared attention, often called joint attention, develops when two people intentionally focus on the same object, event, or activity and recognize that they are experiencing it together. It can support communication, play, learning, and connection. It does not require constant eye contact or one specific response.
Parents can create opportunities for shared attention through books, simple games, and everyday play. The most useful starting point is not directing the child to perform. It is noticing what already interests them, joining respectfully, and responding to their communication.
What Shared Attention Can Look Like
The University of North Carolina describes joint attention as intentionally coordinating attention with another person for a social purpose. One person may point to a toy, sound, or picture, while the other person follows that cue. A child may also initiate the interaction by showing, pointing to, or bringing something to another person.
Shared attention may include:
- Looking between an object and another person
- Pointing, reaching, showing, or giving
- Moving closer or positioning an object where someone can see it
- Repeating an action, sound, or phrase that another person enjoyed
- Using speech, gestures, signs, pictures, or an AAC system to comment
- Pausing during a familiar activity and waiting for a partner to continue
- Returning to a person to restart a shared game
The American Speech-Language-Hearing Association notes that autistic shared attention may involve attending to a common object or activity without looking directly into another person’s eyes. Its clinical guidance on autism and social communication also recognizes speech, gestures, movement, scripts, and AAC as meaningful forms of communication.
Start With the Child’s Interests
Before introducing a book or game, watch what the child chooses. Notice the objects, movements, sounds, sensory experiences, and routines that hold their attention. Interest gives the interaction a natural reason to continue.
Instead of taking over, join the activity at the child’s pace. If they spin a toy wheel, sit nearby and spin another wheel. If they arrange figures, hand over the next figure or arrange your own. If they press a button to hear a sound, imitate the sound and wait. These small responses show that you noticed what matters to them.
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommends imitating and describing a child’s actions to support connection, attention, and language. Its guidance on connecting and communicating with young children explains that imitation shows interest, while simple descriptions give the child language connected to what they are already doing.
A Simple Step-by-Step Approach
- Observe. Notice what the child selects and how they interact with it.
- Join. Move nearby without interrupting or rearranging their activity.
- Imitate. Copy an action, sound, or play pattern using your own materials when possible.
- Comment. Use short language that matches the moment, such as “The train is fast” or “You found the red one.”
- Pause. Leave space for any response, including a gesture, movement, sound, word, or AAC selection.
- Respond. Continue the enjoyable activity when the child communicates interest.
- Offer, do not force. Add one small variation and return to the familiar activity if the child declines it.
This approach also supports cooperative play without forcing participation. A child may first tolerate another person nearby, then accept imitation, exchange an item, or take a brief turn. Each step can be meaningful.
Build Shared Attention With Books
Books provide a clear shared object, but the goal does not have to be finishing every page or reading every sentence. Choose books connected to the child’s interests and let them decide how long to stay.
Let the child control part of the activity
Invite the child to turn pages, lift flaps, touch textures, press sound buttons, or choose between two books. If they return to the same page, treat that repetition as useful information about what interests them.
Comment more than you question
Repeated questions can make reading feel like a test. Try brief comments instead:
- “That dog is running.”
- “You found the tiny wheel.”
- “Splash! The duck is in the water.”
Pause after a comment. The child may look, point, smile, repeat a sound, turn the page, or use AAC. Respond to the form of communication they use rather than waiting for a spoken answer.
Connect the page to familiar experiences
If the book shows a bus, you might mention the child’s school bus or make its familiar sound. If it shows a swing, recall the playground. These connections can help the book become part of a shared experience rather than a separate lesson.
Build Shared Attention With Simple Games
Short, predictable games create natural opportunities for anticipation, pausing, and back-and-forth interaction. Choose games the child can stop easily.
Ready, set, go
Use a car ramp, marble run, spinning top, or wind-up toy. Say “Ready, set…” and pause before “go.” Continue when the child communicates readiness through movement, a sound, a word, a sign, or AAC. Avoid withholding the activity until the child makes eye contact.
Bubbles
Blow a few bubbles, then close the container and pause. The child may reach, gesture, vocalize, select “more,” or hand the container back. Acknowledge the request and continue. If opening the container is difficult, keep it adult-managed without requiring the child to ask in one prescribed way.
Rolling and sending
Roll a ball, car, or soft object back and forth. Begin with a very short distance and one exchange. Increase the number of turns only while the child remains comfortable. Families working on waiting and turn-taking can keep the wait brief and predictable.
Pause-and-continue songs
Sing a familiar song and pause before a favorite word or movement. Continue after any clear signal of interest. The purpose is shared enjoyment, not testing whether the child supplies the missing lyric.
Build Shared Attention During Everyday Play
Shared attention practice does not need to become a separate home program. It can happen while building with blocks, lining up figures, watching water pour, pushing vehicles, drawing, cooking, swinging, or taking a walk.
In play-based ABA and Natural Environment Teaching, learning opportunities are embedded in activities that are already meaningful. The adult follows motivation, models useful communication, and arranges manageable opportunities to participate.
Join repetitive play respectfully
Repetitive play may be enjoyable, regulating, or purposeful. Do not disrupt it simply to make the play look more typical. Begin by watching or imitating. If the child welcomes participation, offer a related action, sound, or object. Back away from the variation if it causes distress.
Model communication without demanding repetition
If the child reaches for another block, model “more block” verbally or with AAC and then provide it. If they move away, model “all done” and honor the message. Families can also explore ways to support children who communicate without many spoken words.
ASHA explains that AAC can supplement or provide an alternative to speech. An AAC response, gesture, or movement should be treated as communication rather than as a lesser substitute for spoken language.
Use natural reinforcement
The most relevant outcome is often built into the activity. If the child requests more bubbles, blow more bubbles. If they show you a toy, notice it with them. If they communicate “stop,” stop. This makes the connection between communication and its outcome clear. Parents can learn more about choosing meaningful outcomes in this guide to positive reinforcement.
Recognize Progress Without Expecting One Correct Response
Progress is individual and may be subtle. It can include:
- Remaining near a shared activity for a little longer
- Noticing or copying another person’s action
- Bringing an object to someone
- Taking one comfortable turn
- Responding to a pause in a familiar game
- Using a gesture, sound, word, sign, picture, or AAC selection to comment
- Returning to restart an enjoyable interaction
- Clearly communicating “no,” “stop,” or “all done”
A randomized trial found that targeted joint-attention and symbolic-play interventions improved certain joint-attention and play behaviors in young autistic children. The researchers described the findings as promising while also noting the need for more evidence about long-term outcomes. Parents can review the joint-attention intervention study on PubMed.
Independent play and downtime remain valuable. The goal is to expand opportunities for communication and shared enjoyment, not to require continuous social engagement.
When Additional Support May Help
Consider discussing shared-attention, play, or communication concerns with a pediatrician, speech-language pathologist, BCBA, occupational therapist, or the child’s school team when they affect participation, safety, learning, or family routines. A qualified professional can assess the child’s strengths, communication methods, sensory needs, and environments before recommending goals.
If your family is exploring individualized support, you can review Kids Club ABA services or contact the team. Goals should be useful to the child, respectful of their communication, and responsive to family priorities.
Key Takeaways
- Shared attention means intentionally focusing on an object, event, or activity with another person.
- Direct eye contact is not required. Gaze shifts, gestures, movement, speech, signs, pictures, and AAC can all communicate shared interest.
- Start by observing the child’s interests, joining their activity, and imitating before adding new ideas.
- Books, short games, songs, and everyday play create natural opportunities for pausing and back-and-forth interaction.
- Respond to all clear communication, including requests to stop, and preserve time for independent play.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does shared attention require eye contact?
No. A child may share attention by looking at the same object, pointing, moving closer, showing an item, vocalizing, using AAC, or returning to continue an activity. Eye contact should not be forced.
What toys are useful for shared-attention activities?
Choose toys and materials the child already enjoys. Bubbles, balls, ramps, musical toys, blocks, sensory materials, books with flaps, and simple cause-and-effect toys can create natural opportunities to pause and respond. The child’s interest matters more than the toy category.
How can I join a child’s lining-up or repetitive play?
Begin by watching without changing the arrangement. You might hand over the next item, imitate the pattern with your own materials, or make a brief comment. Add a small variation only if the child welcomes it, and return to the familiar routine if they show discomfort.
What if my child does not use spoken words?
Accept gestures, signs, body movement, pictures, communication boards, and speech-generating devices. Model the child’s available communication system without requiring them to copy you before continuing an enjoyable activity.
How long should we practice?
There is no required session length. A few enjoyable exchanges during a familiar routine may be more useful than extending an activity after the child has disengaged. Follow the child’s signals and end when they communicate that they are finished.
Build Connection From What the Child Already Enjoys
Shared attention grows through responsive interaction. Notice what captures the child’s interest, join without taking over, pause for their response, and treat their communication as meaningful. A shared sound, repeated action, returned toy, or brief turn can become the beginning of a richer back-and-forth exchange.
This article provides general educational information and does not replace individualized medical, developmental, behavioral, or communication guidance from qualified professionals.